Brutally Honest Profile Scores Wife

Creating an online dating profile was never easy for me. Whenever I’d read other profiles and they all sounded too good to be anywhere near true. Like their mother had written their profiles. Look, I’m not famous, I’m not particularly wealthy, and let’s face it, depending on the lighting I’m at best moderately attractive. I felt awkward exaggerating my accomplishments and making outlandish claims about my aspirations. But I still wanted to meet someone so — one day I decided I’d had enough.

Then it came to me — that being straight-forward was probably my only hope. And I wrote this profile:

“To Whom It May Concern, I am your average looking 29 year old guy without a lot of money and in a job that is not dead-end, but certainly not worthy of boasting about. Can’t stand long strolls and I detest getting lost in the rain it makes my nose runny. However, I still have most of my hair, my beer gut will never protrude more than two inches over my belt line, I love eating floppy pizza and watching Westerns. If this doesn’t make you run away, I may be your man, so let’s just marry.”

Needless to say, I received a lot of responses; however, most of them were downright mean. There was one response that caught my eye; for its simplicity, as it was the best two word message I ever received: “I do”. After some nervous pacing, I emailed my respondent and we hit it off immediately. Two days later we had a date, and we have not looked back. I am now 31 years old, still have the majority of my hair, I must say the belly is getting a bit bigger than promised, but I’m still madly in love with my wife.

People wonder what was the trick? In my humble belief, it all came down to unadulterated honesty and I think she’d agree too.