Eliminate Those Unobtainable Standards

We all want love, and we all want to find that perfect someone who melts us like a stick of butter and delivers endless orgasms. But some of you want butter melting, strong finances, a specific shade of hair, blue eyes, no children, no baggage, height/weight requirements, gourmet cooking skills, golden personality traits, AND endless orgasms. Well, you might be out of luck because the chances of finding someone who matches every criteria you’ve ever had for a lover is slim to none.

Are your expectations too high? Are you just too damn picky? If you’re still alone and wondering why, that just might be the reason.

That old saying “nobody’s perfect” is a saying for a reason: it’s true. The perfect man or woman simply does not exist, and if you’re still clinging to that hope, you are doomed. In fact, some of your failed relationships may have ended because what seemed like perfection in the beginning had some pretty hairy, smelly, obnoxious flaws upon closer inspection.

Lasting relationships do not come easily, and if you’re tossing out the baby with the bath water, so to speak, you may be missing out on something that is sincere and rewarding. This is not to say that you shouldn’t have standards, but your standards should never include things that would be out of the other person’s control. Imagine that you are being judged by your own criteria–would you pass the test? If not, it may be time to re-evaluate.

It may also be a good time to get the romance novels, pornography, chick flicks, and similar sappy drivel. These things aren’t bad in small doses, but when the characters become your archetype of an ideal mate, it’s time give them a rest. It’s entertainment, folks, and it’s written specifically to push certain buttons; not as an honest reflection of real life and relationships. Even porn stars have flaws.

Finally, ask yourself why your standards are so high. Are you looking for specific qualities because you think they are compatible with your own, or because they are things missing from past relationships (romantic or platonic)? Do you see things within yourself you dislike and are trying to sweep under the rug with a mate that embodies those things? Don’t sell yourself short, you deserve love and happiness, but understand that true connections are more than just boxes on your checklist.